over the last couple of months i've realized i had to come to terms with a simple, yet hard to swallow fact -- not everyone is going to like me. in a perfect world with perfect people, maybe the possibility of being liked by everyone would be possible. maybe. but with me leading the way with my imperfections, we'll never get a chance to find out.
here is something else i've realized: there are worse things in the world than having some people who don't like me. for someone who has spent most of her life trying to please people, often foregoing her own opinion to stay agreeable to others or even blocking off her point of view for fear of being made fun of or being rejected, this was personally an earth-shattering revelation. one that allowed me to breathe easier, and one that is definitely still taking its time to sink in. it has also opened me up to cutting myself a little slack when i disappoint someone. when my normal tendency is to be extensively hard on myself, knowing that i can't be and do right all the time is quite liberting because it allows me to move on without having to carry the excess weight of blunders past. i've found that asking forgiveness from others is a lot less complicated if i'm able to forgive myself first.
there's also: you can't make someone happy all the time, you can't make everyone happy all the time and everyone can't make me happy all the time. but it's not the end of the world, because happiness, as i've been reminded lately, isn't the point. people's constant satisfaction, including my own, is not the goal. if it was, we'd never reach it anyway -- we're all too different and flawed.
i'm honestly not just looking for an excuse to be obnoxious or to not be a good person or to not be a person who does good. i'm also not wanting to stop trying to be as agreeable as i possibly can. it's simply too exhausting to try to please everybody all the time. take it from someone who's spent years and years trying. today i'm just grateful for this leeway that i've been given to be myself, flaws and everything. after all, i can only endeavor to do my best in living life, in making choices. the same grace extends not just to me, but to everyone. so while it may never make everyone happy, it has to be enough because it's all that anyone can justifiably expect.
Friday, October 24, 2008
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5 comments:
i can't ever imagine someone not liking you. i loved you as soon as i met you!
but, i understand completley where your coming from. it is WAY too exhausting to try and please everyone all the time. i've tried too. i still like it when i can make someone happy, but i can't cry over every time i don't. your a great person, and a great friend. and i am so blessed to have you in my life, as my friend. Love you!
I think we all face to some extent and it is comforting knowing that we have to Grace fall back on. And I think forgiving ourselves first is a great point, but prob one of the hardest, at least for me.
Well I just love you!!! Be who you are! That's all that matter, I agree stop pleasing people, if sell ourselves short, we are saying, God you didn't do good enough, so I'm going to be something different, but instead lets embrace who God made us, and say to him, I trust you made me this way, because it's your work at your best,
Anna, I see God at his best when i see and am around you! I love you, and I can't wait to start seeing more the real you!!!!
Girrrl. Seems we're learning the same lessons. Although, I must say, I was never as sweet and agreeable as you. LOL
LOL watchu talking about?!?!?!
errrybody likes ME :)
LOL
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